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Sexual Life Today 
Textbooks, psychology, fiction and non-fiction used to be the major sections of bookshops. Today however, another section is fast gaining popularity: the “interests” section. Roped off with red velvet in this corner is a bookstand with several spotlights – highlighting books of “interest” with titles like “Unleashing Your Inner Tiger”, “The Art of the Quickie”, “Power: Becoming Multi-Orgasmic”, “How to Ejaculate Successfully” and many more. Not to be outdone, the Internet is also bannering similar titles in the World Wide Web, even going as far as on-line video lessons and live performances.
While these things can still be classified under “subtle changes”, it is a significant indication of the casual status modern sex has achieved. For many, it has become ordinary, with adults no longer cringing when it is the topic of conversation and children no longer covering their eyes at the sight of a naked man and woman.
America is widely and unofficially recognized as the liberal capital of the sexual revolution. “Partner” is in the same league as “husband” and “wife” with more Americans coming out in the open with female-to-female or male-to-male relationships. Though this partnership does not come with traditional sex, they are actively pursuing their sexual satisfaction, often resulting in long, steamy sessions that end up in the Internet.
Technology plays a major part in today’s sexual exploits. Going on-line in chat rooms can guarantee you a willing sex partner in less than half an hour. On-line sex using a web camera has also become the “in” thing – sexual satisfaction without leaving the comforts of your home and minus the STD.
The scenario does not differ much across countries and continents. The word “inhibition” is buried underground. Today, we see countries like Canada and Australia legalizing same sex marriage. Despite the low percentage of home Internet connections, third world countries are growing interest in online sex (thus the birth of internet cafes with private cubicles).
The book Modern Sex by Myron Magnet and company tackle sex-related subjects ranging from the eclipse of the manly ideal to the benefits of marriage to the TV show Sex and the City to teen sex. The book offers a lot of insights and arguably beautiful observations about sex in our times, with one research result showing oral sex as commonplace activity in middle schools (ages 11 to 14), with children apparently labeling it “just fooling around” and not considering it as sex at all.
Though the book is somewhat opinionated in some aspects rather than being factual, it offers an impassionate assessment of the hit HBO comedy “Sex and the City” entitled “Sex, Sadness and the City” which is sure to give the show’s millions of fans a debating point.
Sexual Liberation is a sensitive topic with conservatives and liberals clashing head-on. While the conservative side declares it as becoming increasingly mechanical and without commitment, the liberals are arguing to the high heavens that it is about time to let go of sexual inhibitions and embrace sex for what (they think) it’s supposed to be: a delicious meal to be enjoyed at leisure, rather like a Thanksgiving-worthy turkey and a Fourth of July-caliber apple pie washed down with the best champagne money can buy.
In ancient times, sex was purely for reproduction purposes. Now, it has become a pleasure source, with both men and women bent on being highly satisfied after each encounter. Sex today does not have to be with one’s wife or husband. It has come as far as being with someone else’s wife or husband.
An interesting site on the Internet traces the sex timeline as far back as Mesopotamia, known to have the oldest records of human history, and is said to be the first human civilization. This sex timeline is categorized into important periods/groups/persons in history (Mesopotamia, Ancient Egypt, Ancient India, Ancient China, Early Biblical, Early Mediterranean, Ancient Greece, Incan Empire, Aztec Empire, Mayan Empire, Native Americans, Roman Empire, Middle Ages, Renaissance or Reformation, Puritans, Victorianism, Adolf Hitler, Kinsey – 1950’s, and the sex revolution of the 1960’s), in chronological order and each with its own History of Sex highlights.
Tradition used to be the focal point of every sexual act, with strange rituals such as framing the sheets used on the couple’s first night to be able to display on a wall the proof of a woman’s innocence prior to marriage - her stain of honor.
Imagine having a display such the “Stain of Honor frame” on your living room today and watching your guest as they squirm uncomfortably, sneaking awkward glances at your creative interior designing.
Though there might not be enough credible proof to back it up, some people believe that the word “fuck” traces its roots to the period of king-rulers and actually means Fornication Under Consent of the King, with tradition supposedly dictating that before a wife is turned over to her husband, the first night must be spent with the king.
Again, imagine having this rule today. The protesters will be out in the streets in a minute demanding the abolition of such rule because if not, every single American woman will have to sleep with George Bush before they can have sex with their husbands. Lucky would be those countries with women-presidents. Then again, will it mean requiring the men to sleep with the current woman-president or prime minister before having sex with their wives?
Today, sex is geared towards reaching and encouraging as many people as possible, no matter their age. Sex cartoons are even growing underground popularity with children watching in fascination as Popeye and Olive get it on or as Sailor Moon bares her lacy thongs.
We may never reach a conclusion of what exactly sex is today, except that it is more popular and adventurous, but it would be safe to say that “Sex is in the eye of the beholder” (much like how “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”). Whether it is condemned to be a mechanical act and no longer the private sphere of pro-creation it used to be, the real deal will ultimately be decided by the persons engaging in it. |
| Average rating: 3 | Add 09 Feb 06 Allen |
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| Comments |
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| threedee |
I'm not so sure I agree that America is the capital of the new sexual revolution. We don't have legalized prostitution except in one sparsely-populated state (unlike Denmark and many Asian countries), we don't have legalized same-sex marriage (like Spain), and we're starting to see a movement against abortion -- not the sign of a sexually-enlightened culture.
Sex isn't fast food. It should be a banquet, a feast. When we make love, it should be a marvelous experience, not just the relief of an urge like going to the bathroom.
I honestly think that some of the new sexual "freedom" is terrible for men. (just bear with me, here!) For men, sex is an expression of intimacy, just as romance and intimate speech is for women. How terrible that suddenly, men can sleep with dozens of willing women, walk away the next day, and not have that genuine intimacy that grows from a longer term sexual relationship? How satisfying are one-night stands, really, to men? I suspect they're better for women than for men, now that we're getting over our sexual guilt.
So we sleep with men, and then we dump them. That's the new trend. Though men are probably all about that in the beginning, doesn't it start feeling empty after the hundredth one-night stand?
That's not to say we should go back. Over-repressed sexuality is probably worse than over-expressed sexuality. But -- I'm trying to teach my kids to be careful of this. We'll see what happens. |
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